WEBVTT 00:06.500 --> 00:08.389 My name is Colonel Mark Bum . I'm 00:08.389 --> 00:10.389 currently the commanding officer of 00:10.389 --> 00:12.556 Marine Corps Air Station Buford and my 00:12.556 --> 00:14.880 hometown is Milford Michigan . We went 00:14.890 --> 00:18.319 on deployment in 2005 from right here 00:18.329 --> 00:20.385 at Marine Corps Air Station Beaufort 00:20.385 --> 00:22.607 Man . I was a young captain at the time 00:22.607 --> 00:24.969 and was a weapons and sensors officer , 00:24.979 --> 00:27.520 sat in the back seat of the F-18 . In 00:27.530 --> 00:30.700 my situation , I kind of existed in two 00:30.709 --> 00:34.299 worlds . I had the one world which was 00:34.849 --> 00:37.659 the most professionally challenged and 00:37.669 --> 00:39.669 professionally rewarding . I'd ever 00:39.669 --> 00:42.020 been in my life . And at the same time , 00:42.400 --> 00:44.849 the life that I knew back here in South 00:44.860 --> 00:48.659 Carolina was falling apart . So we 00:48.669 --> 00:52.279 used to live in these little white 00:52.419 --> 00:55.599 things we refer to as cans . I'd put my 00:55.610 --> 00:57.666 cover on one of the sticky hooks and 00:57.666 --> 01:00.360 I'd put my holster on another one of 01:00.369 --> 01:02.479 the , the sticky hooks and then 01:02.490 --> 01:05.099 sometimes just stare at it while I was 01:05.110 --> 01:07.360 trying to fall asleep and wonder how I 01:07.370 --> 01:09.592 was gonna make it through another day . 01:09.592 --> 01:12.139 I hope no one . I hope nobody ever has 01:12.150 --> 01:14.150 to go through what I went through . 01:14.150 --> 01:16.317 Right . It is an unfortunate fact that 01:16.317 --> 01:18.539 50% of marriages in a divorce , but not 01:18.539 --> 01:20.910 all of them end when you're 8000 miles 01:20.919 --> 01:23.030 away with two kids . And , you know , 01:23.030 --> 01:25.141 the thing is I thought that I'd never 01:25.141 --> 01:27.141 see my kids anymore . You know that 01:27.141 --> 01:26.639 it's not true that you're never gonna 01:26.650 --> 01:28.706 see anybody anymore , but that's not 01:28.706 --> 01:30.928 what your mind tells you . Right . Your 01:30.928 --> 01:33.094 mind , your mind tells you that life's 01:33.094 --> 01:32.639 gonna be completely different . People 01:32.650 --> 01:34.817 aren't gonna respect you and you never 01:34.817 --> 01:37.870 wanted to fail at anything and yet 01:37.879 --> 01:39.712 you're failing at maybe the most 01:39.712 --> 01:41.712 important thing II , I tried when I 01:41.712 --> 01:43.990 came home , I buried myself in my work . 01:43.990 --> 01:46.430 And so it took someone else to finally 01:46.440 --> 01:49.650 see it and to step up and offer 01:50.349 --> 01:52.293 some of that help before I finally 01:52.293 --> 01:55.400 recognized that I really needed it . I 01:55.410 --> 01:58.809 think as marines , we often think 01:59.510 --> 02:01.288 that if we have to ask for some 02:01.288 --> 02:03.730 assistance that somehow makes us weak 02:04.199 --> 02:06.255 and in the 20 years that have passed 02:06.255 --> 02:08.477 since then , the one thing I've learned 02:08.477 --> 02:10.477 is that's 100% not true . There's a 02:10.477 --> 02:12.643 variety of resources , right ? Keep in 02:12.643 --> 02:14.866 mind , especially with the four pillars 02:14.866 --> 02:16.866 concept that all this stuff is tied 02:16.866 --> 02:18.977 together , physical , mental , social 02:18.977 --> 02:21.088 and spiritual , but the resources you 02:21.088 --> 02:23.310 have fap resources , right ? You've got 02:23.310 --> 02:25.588 community counseling program resources . 02:25.588 --> 02:27.921 We have M Flax , we have fellow marines . 02:27.921 --> 02:30.143 You've got 988 . There are a variety of 02:30.143 --> 02:32.310 different resources that are out there 02:32.310 --> 02:34.421 for anybody . If you can't figure out 02:34.421 --> 02:36.588 anybody else to contact , contact me . 02:36.588 --> 02:38.755 Right . I'll be there if you're having 02:38.755 --> 02:40.866 issues whatsoever , just reach out to 02:40.866 --> 02:42.449 anybody and they'll help you .